I look 12...I'M NOT

Alright, the next person that asks me how old I am and is shocked when I tell them I'm 20 years old is gonna get bitch slapped. Today, I was talking to some chick and this happened:

-early in the conversation-
me: Yeah, cus I'm going back to Boston for graduation in a few weeks blahblahblah
her: graduating from where?
me: Boston University
her: oh cool blahblahblah
-5 minutes later-
her: how old are you?
me: 20.
her: you're fucking kidding me!? You look so much younger
me in my head: BITCH I JUST TOLD YOU I'M GRADUATING COLLEGE! HOW OLD DID YOU THINK I WAS?! I'M NOT THE KID FROM FUCKING SMART GUY! YOU PROBABLY DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT SHOW IS CUS YOU'RE A BABY! WHO DOES THIS BITCH THINK SHE IS? ALRIGHT I'M GONNA STOP SCREAMING AT YOU IN MY HEAD NOW. God dammit. Conversation over.
me IRL: Nah, I'm 20. Pass the chips.

I've been asked so many times and sometimes it doesn't bother me but sometimes it makes me wanna cut a bitch, usually when it's followed by "well one day that'll be a good thing." Telling me that "one day" looking young will be a good thing but that doesn't make me feel better. I won't care how old I look at age 45, and if I do I'll be one of those pathetic people. Aging is just a part of life ladies and gents, time to get over it. It's always awkward to see real life Mrs. George's (Regina's mom) trying to be "hip" and "with it." When you're middle aged, no one cares if you're uncool. Shit, no one cares if you're uncool now but I get trying to fit in at this age because of peer pressure and all that jazz. But if you're middle aged and you're still giving in to peer pressure, you need to look at your life, look at your choices because no one cares how old you look and if they do, they aren't worth your time. Think of it this way, if I look 30 when I'm 45 everyone is gonna be like "damn that's the most boring 30 year old I've ever seen!" I'll be old and they'll think I'm boring. It's a lose/lose. So stop telling me that looking young in the future is gonna be a good thing, it makes you seem like a shallow asshole.

What the hell am I talking about? How did I get here? Is parking validated? Help!

My point is, next time you ask someone how old they are, use deductive reasoning first. If you just saw me get out of the drivers seat of a car, you know that I'm AT LEAST 16. If you see my BU hoodie, boom I just aged another two years, 18. If the hoodie looks old, add another year to that. When you hear quote Legally Blonde (a movie that is 12 years old), think to yourself hmm this girl had to have been at least 8 if she saw this in theatres and remembers it. When we have entire conversations about Boy Meets World, Rocket Power or All That, it's safe to assume that I was born in the early 90s. And WHEN I TELL YOU I'M GRADUATING COLLEGE, assume that I'm not 12/13 years old.

So next time you're pretty positive that someone is older than they look but aren't sure, don't ask them. Live forever wondering how old they were OR just facebook stalk them when you get home. If they hid the year they were born, (like I did for shits and giggles) look at when they graduate high school and go from there. Don't pretend you haven't fb stalked someone before...

Aight friends, thanks for putting up with my stupid little rant. I just have to accept the fact that when I'm 21, I'm gonna have to take my passport to the bars just to get in. -Sigh- Such is life.

Until we meet again.
-Yanz

PS. If you have a good poker face you could also just ask and then accept whatever answer they give you and move on.